Home

This is what The Tot tells anyone who is trying to hug or love on her when she is interested in doing something other than hugging or loving. And, yes, it’s all my fault. One day when I asked “Can Mommy have Little Huggies?” and she got flustered (I took that to be a “no”), I said “That’s okay, Tater Tot is busy, busy, busy.” And of course she repeated “Bissy, bissy, bissy.” So now she automatically says “Bissy, bissy, bissy” when someone tries to invade her space. I doubt she really knows what it means but it’s clear that she knows that it keeps her from having to do something that she doesn’t want to do right that minute (having her personal space invaded). And that’s what matters. It doesn’t sound cuddly and lovey that there are times that my child doesn’t want to be hugged by me or anyone else but that’s who she is. She is plenty affectionate at other times when she is not intent on exploring the entire universe (and she does want to explore it all!). I’m secretly glad that I inadvertently taught her “bissy, bissy” because it helps her to assert her independence. If she can stand up to me, she surely can stand up to the poor influences that will cross her path down the road, right? I am not going to be The Mommy that insists that The Tot kisses her Auntie So-And-So or Grandma or Whoever. She’ll kiss them if she wants to. If not, they’ll know that they’ve got a little more work to do getting to know her before she wants to be affectionate with them. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not going to let her be rude but I also won’t let other people break the boundaries that she feels comfortable with. Hey, can you tell I’ve thought about this a little? Yeah, I know. I think A LOT.